Written By Tamar Z. Kahane, PsyD., Founder and Clinical Director of The Kahane Center
There’s been a lot of noise this week following the latest jury ruling on social media and children’s mental health. And while the conversation is important, it keeps circling around the wrong question.
Everyone is asking: “Is social media harmful?”
But that’s not actually the most useful place to start.
The better question is this: Does my child have the skills to use social media — without it using them?
Consider this: two children can have the same phone, the same apps, the same screen time limits — and have completely different outcomes. The difference isn’t the technology. It’s what’s happening on the inside.
Impulse Control · Delay of Gratification · Emotional Regulation · Self-Awareness · Self-Monitoring · Focused Attention · Flexibility · Perspective Taking · Empathy · Time Management · Prioritization.
These are the executive functioning and social-emotional skills that determine how a child navigates not just social media, but every challenge they’ll face growing up. And here’s what matters most: they can be taught.
This is exactly what parents build through the POWERS Parenting Program. Not strategies for controlling behavior — but tools for developing the underlying skills their children need to manage themselves, their devices, and their priorities, so that when we’re not there to step in, they’re equipped to make good decisions on their own.
And for the educators in classrooms and schools navigating this same reality every day, the POWERS for Educators Program brings that same commitment into the school setting — equipping teachers, counselors, and school leaders with a dedicated framework for building these skills in the students they serve.
Limiting access has its place. But capacity is what lasts.
As this conversation continues to unfold in courtrooms, classrooms and living rooms across the country, we believe the most powerful thing a parent or educator can do isn’t to take the phone away. It’s to ask: “How do I raise a child, who can manage themselves — not just their screen time?”
That’s the work we do every day.
Register for POWERS Parenting Spring ’26 Waitlist.
Warmly,
Tamar Z. Kahane and The Kahane Center Team
